Aimless

It's one of those days... the not so nice ones. When you feel like leaving everything back, and running. To where, even I don't know. But there are times when you feel like you're done. Done with the whole lot- your dreams, your ambition, your big plans in life and the like... there's so much to add to the list that it's futile to continue. And then you feel like you're left with a void, like your soul is missing. Maybe it's a phase, maybe it's not. All I know is that I'm lost- completely aimless.

'Someone new' :)

Don’t you think that sometimes life becomes so routine and mundane with the same things and same people day in and day out? The afore mentioned are vital to my existance, but it’s like we get accustomed to a particular pattern of living. In all of this, we often forget the joy of meeting new people.

Take yesterday for instance. A bunch of friends and I were all watching the World Cup final match at a friend’s place (India won... Yay!) when another friend’s friend came visiting. A little confusing I know, but I would ask you to focus on the friend’s friend = Mr. K... So, my friend is busy with her round of introductions, telling Mr. K about us and trying to make him remember who’s who. The poor man tries his best to recollect, only to confirm the same an hour later. As the evening progressed, we got talking. We spoke about some interesting stuff, sharing information about ourselves, general insights and the like. And that’s when it struck me how a simple conversation with a stranger could actually feel like a breath of fresh air!

India went on to create history as they won the cup that counts. In the meanwhile in my head, I was still analyzing meeting Mr. K. I attempted to brush aside the fact that all my friends in the room were aiming to play cupid and hook us up.  I found the entire situation rather amusing, if I may add. They were on a mission.

Eventually, all of us landed up on the streets of Mumbai, where everyone was celebrating the most awaited victory. The taxi driver was also high on the festivities, as he charged us a bomb for a measly ride. Our dear Hyderabad-bred Mr. K almost got a cultural shock to see so many people out on the roads (boys and GIRLS, mind you) at that unearthly hour. We let him ponder over the surroundings as we continued to rejoice with the nation. All I said to him was, “Welcome to Bombay!” grinning wide from ear to ear.

After gallivanting on the streets, posing for the shutterbugs, blasting the cab speakers to the loudest possible, sitting on each others laps to fit in 6 people in one taxi and getting caught by the cops... we found our end destination in Taj Lands End, Bandra. To our utmost surprise or should I say shock, we were promptly stopped at the gate by the security guards who refused to let us go into their 24x7 coffee shop. After a lot of arguing, validating and reasoning we were allowed to go in. (I still don’t understand why they were not permitting people to enter in the first place!) This was followed by a thorough thrashing of the ‘Manager’ as we expressed our disgust at the way we were just treated and not to forget, conveniently took the opportunity to boast about the powers of the profession we are in.

When we were finally led into the coffee shop, they took hours to serve us. So Mr. K and myself set up a little bet for ourselves. He had to approach this unknown foreigner who had just come into the place and get me the Indian flag he had with him. And if he succeeded I had to drink a few drops of their fountain water at the lobby (it doesn’t sound even a fraction of how bad it actually was). Needless to say, we both triumphed at our respective tasks and as an afterthought, laughed over it all as well.

Our ‘fun outing’ came to an end at 6 in the morning... As I said my polite, "It was nice meeting you, stay in touch,"... He responded, "I'd love to stay in touch, but I'd need your phone number for that!" (smartypants) So after doing the needful, Mr. K headed to the airport to catch a flight to Bangalore and I took a cab back home. As my head hit the pillow all set to slip into a deep slumber, I couldn’t help but grin... beam at the sweet fortune of my transitory rendezvous with Mr. K... Momentary though it may have been, I found myself smiling at the thought of meeting ‘someone new’.

The one-liner mood

So let the randomness unfold...

• Once more a person around me misinterprets the profession of Public Relations... I will personally take classes for them on the subject.

• The season of crushes is here to stay... *Sigh*

• Kellogg’s Chocos now with Wholegrain. It’s been on my mind all day. Maybe I should actually start eating wholegrain food and think about being healthy. These signs from God, I tell you!

• Pursuing something I know is probably futile and may backfire. Am I fighting a lost battle?

• To have people talk well about you to others long after you’ve moved on is more precious than any award, degree or certificate. Thank you Xavier Institute of Communications, for all the respect :)

• I wanted to be just like the character Linda from Captain Planet in my childhood. I wonder what happened to that ambition.

• I’m actually giving career advice to budding PR professionals... Wow! (I feel old)

• Out of the 7 deadly sins of wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony: I am.... Hmmm interesting!

• Slowly, but surely I’m beginning to do things I never thought I would. May the process of self-exploration continue... I’m lovin’ it!

• To be or not to be is the question... Will I ever learn how to not cross the line?

I need you to keep me going

Hello there... It’s been a while since I’ve penned my thoughts down. Work has kept me pretty tied-up. Plus I didn’t really have a significant story to tell. Not that I have one now. Though there have been some things on my mind lately... and like always, I find solace in my writing.

I often wonder where my dreams will take me. I have just begun the journey, and yet it feels like I’m already leaving so many things behind- home, hobbies, holidays, health, and more importantly- family. There are times that I want to put it all aside and crawl back into my cocoon. It’s far from compromise, for I am doing what I’ve always wanted to. I am aware of my goals and I work very hard towards achieving them. By the grace of God, most of them come close to being fulfilled. Reason to be happy, I know.

However, in the entire colourful landscape, there seems like a small void is creeping in. The past few years of proving myself and being on top of things has probably made me neglect other aspects of life. It’s not a case of being stuck in the rut for sure; I do find different ways of doing the same things. So I trick boredom into staying miles away from me. I also find ways to motivate myself professionally and grow, wherein I’m sure I’ll do alright. Work is priority right now... and I wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

Though, there probably is a lack of someone special- a companion, a confidante, a commitment. Someone to call every night, someone to be worried about and take care of, someone who would keep me at the centre of their attention, someone to build memories with, someone to love back.  Don’t ask me where these thoughts come from, for even I don’t quite know.

Ironic are the ways of life. It’s like a conflict with myself. Where one part of me says I’m right on track- going solo and living it up, whereas the other makes me feel like time is slipping away and so are my chances of finidng a soul mate I can spend my life with. I’m not quite sure of what’s tugging at my heart strings and who I’m looking for. Maybe he’s to make an entry soon, maybe he’s right here around me at present, and maybe he’s always been one of my closest friends.

Whoever you are- I need you to keep me going. 

The day I “fell” for Genesis Burson-Marsteller!

The Xavier Institute of Communications was busy with its everyday activities as usual; classes, assignments, tests, a packed timetable and the usual peripheral activities. We were all lost in our own respective little worlds when reality dawned upon us- The Public Relations & Corporate Communication batch placement phase was soon to start.

The course coordinator was at his diplomatic best trying to rope in the top PR agencies to recruit and take in all 53 of his ‘lovely and bright’ students- they were, after all, “the future of the PR industry”. Administration and staff was at its peak of efficiency; all e-mails on time, no phone calls missed and timely company allotments. Faculty members were trying to be as supportive as they could, guiding and advising. The campus suddenly went abuzz like never before with contemplation, speculation, apprehension. Everyone had just one thing on their minds- I need to get that job!!!

As each one of us tried deciding on what we want to do, which company we would like to join, which domains we wished to work in, which clients excited us, almost to the extent of mapping our entire careers as though all the agencies had a red carpet rolled out for us! Our class being our class, me included, had a zillion questions doing cart wheels in the brain. They fluttered over our heads like mosquitoes do in the dark, round and round in circles, with no purpose whatsoever! We had a few classics as well... “Oh God, what do I do, I just can’t decide yaaaa... should I sit for Perfect or no? Are you sure Hanmer is coming only for internships, are they coming at all???” As one ended his/her dilemma about this near life and death situation, the other one started as if the sky was going to collapse any moment, “Listen... I heard CMCG wants only 3 people. It’s true or what, oh my God, how will I ever make it man??? ”, “No I don’t think I’m sitting for BL, it has only IT clients and apparently they’re not paying very well, you know!” blah blah blah...

The week finally arrived. Everyone’s hitherto neatly folded formals with the naphthalene balls were all out in full grandeur, or the newly bought clothes were in full display. A smile on the face, laden with a line of nervousness, yet laced with a streak of confidence, armed with files, folders, certificates and resumes, we were ready; ready to take the challenge, ready to overcome and ready to conquer.

My phone chain messages were on in full swing... “The ENTIRE class has to be there for the presentation tomorrow. Rajeev Sir’s strict orders. Attendance will be taken.” Websites were researched in the computer labs and discussions went on in the canteen over chai. People religiously asked me every day, “So, you’re sitting for any of the companies today?” And my answer would be the same throughout, “Errr... no.” I was elated as my friends and classmates got their jobs one by one. ‘All the best’ & ‘Congratulations’ were the favourites of the season. I was sooooooooo happy for everyone, and at the same time I was freaked out. As companies came and went, day in and day out, I waited, waited and then waited a little more. What was I doing, what was I thinking, I let go of 6 companies! Damn it, why did Genesis Burson-Marsteller have to come right towards the end?

But I managed to hang in there, show some courage and not have a nervous breakdown. D day was here. After my CR work that day, it finally struck me, “Ok, this is it!” We patiently sat through the presentation, we asked our questions and everything was done with. I realized I had to say something important to Rajeev Sir. I got up to do so and............................. flat! Before I knew it, I had blacked out and fallen. I could see stars, was too weak to get up on my own and my heels added to the drama. And then, I fell again, and again. After my entertaining act, people finally realized that they needed to attend to me! The rigmarole was driving me mad, not to add making me dizzier. Soon everyone crowded around me, helped me up on my feet, made me swallow chocolate and sour punk, stripped me off my jacket, massaged my back, and brushed my hair. And I thought to myself, wow, after waiting all this while, I make an utter fool of myself right in front of the people whose hands my career is in! However, I politely composed myself and with a subtle smile I said, “I’m perfectly fine ma’am. I shall see you in the interview room.” Tamasha khatam.

The rest of the evening was spent in mixed emotions-relief, happiness, anxiety and what not. Finally, the results were out, and I was in! What an adrenalin rush. All of a sudden, nothing else mattered. The wait, the fall, the tension-it all seemed so small and trivial. I had made it and I was ecstatic. Congratulatory hugs, calls and messages followed. I was happy, but what next? I didn’t want to go home at 6 in the evening, that too when I had just earned myself a career launching job.

I guess God had his own celebrations planned for me. I can almost envision the omnipresent up there in the heavens looking down at me with an evil grin and saying, “Who said the adventure was over darling, let the night unfold...”

So what happened? I got lost. Surprised? Don’t be.

TO BE CONTINUED...

The road ahead, with a nostalgic twist

Hello my dearest readers,

Hope you all are doing great...

Yes, I’m back. And that too with a completely new look for my blog! :-)

(By the way, I’d really like opinions on how this template looks. So, write in people.)

The word ‘new’ brings me to the new chapter in my life, the roller-coaster ride that I’m to commence very soon. I’m almost done with the course at XIC and it’s time to start working now. Wow, it seemed like only yesterday that I was this small little girl in school with all her unrealistic dreams bunched up in one corner of her head. Suddenly, I feel all mature. Not that I wasn’t earlier. But daddy’s little girl is finally going to earn her first work paycheque in less than a month. And it’s a journey that I’m ready to take, no matter how many ever ups and downs it brings along with it. A fortnight of placements and I shall have my dream job. *fingers crossed* Pray for me.

It’s been close to a year in Mumbai now, and I have no regrets (Except probably the Shiv Sena and MNS), a beautiful family to be with, a great house to live in, an amazing college to be in and the most awesome friends ever! Naana, naani, Priyamasi, Faridmasa, Azaan, Amaan, Sonali Walia, Swati Drolia, Priyam Duttroy and Anshul Raj; (Mummy, Daddy and Venky for being with me inspite of not being here) you are my world in Mumbai and I cannot thank you enough for being there with me throughout.

The entire XIC, my PR batch mates, Rajeev sir, Niharika ma’am, faculty, friends, and acquaintances have been a constant support, motivating me to work harder and to make a success story of my life here. They’ve provoked me to think deeper, be emotionally stronger, work smarter, personified fun and happiness, spread smiles, created special memories and helped prepare me for the upcoming expedition.

Looking back, there have been various instances related to the people around me, my college, and the city of Bombay which make me rather nostalgic.

The midnight escapades that we (the trio) suddenly decide to have, that too at the most expensive places if I may add where I end up running the highest bill amongst the lot for reasons still unknown to me :-O, the madness in the middle of the Mumbai streets, the never-ending nights and the early sunrise mornings, they’re all divine. It’s at these times that I feel like the all of Bombay/Mumbai belongs only to me.

I have my own little connection with the Western Railways. And with pride I say that it has never disappointed me till date. It religiously comes to my service everyday, always gives me space to travel comfortably, and it gives me the time to think. It sometimes feels so peaceful to be in the train by the window as the wind softly caresses you and you find yourself lost in a world of your own.

College classes, the canteen, the foyer, the comp lab, the student’s lounge, the basketball court, Bling, ITC Grand Central, Marine Drive, the Army Auditorium, Bandra Bandstand, Kala Ghoda, from jalebi to Gelato, I’m going to miss it all!

Be it the long conversations, breaking our head over assignments, moving our leg to the beat, chilling and hanging out, acting absolutely insane, making crazy plans, getting worried over our work and placements or mulling over the future- Sonali (thanks for being so full of life and making me laugh at absolutely anything with your stupid jokes, trying to solve all my problems just to see me happy, encouraging me to think out of the box, making the most outlandish plans and more importantly, making them happen! Ensuring that I’m in the ‘pink’ of health. You are most definitely the livewire of my life and there's no "question" about it! ;-)), Swati (thanks for being so sensible and mature, a calming factor, a great guide and advice-giver, having excellent culinary skills :-), you truly are an inspiration, in every which way!) , Priyam (thanks for bringing a smile onto my face always, bringing in crazy memories, being ever ready to do the most weird things, for being a film buff, for understanding exactly what I’m feeling and how I’m trying to convey it in words, for having faith, belief and confidence in me even at times when I myself don't, and constantly reminding me that being Karishma is a pretty cool thing after all!), Mr. Anshul Raj (thanks for being so good at your work especially the creative aspects, for being a part of all the randomness, for being my ‘mother India’, for letting me bully you, for taking my mood swings, for having your girl fan following, for tolerating my unrealistic demands and wishes, for being a patient listener, for being a complete idiot and the dorkiest boy in my life, for being my supposed/rumoured/alleged love affair in XIC), you’ll rock! And needless to say I love you all very much.

As I look into the prospective months and years, I do see my life facing changes and more importantly myself growing and progressing as a person. I do see myself working hard at something I really want. I do see the people I love close to me, I do see an alteration in my ideologies, thoughts, activities and lifestyle, I do see the comfort, I do see the compromise, and most of all I do see the challenges, I do see, the road ahead...

Snippets

Hey there all you lovely people,

Owing to the government’s order regarding the Swine Flu situation, my ‘ever-so-generous’ college (I still love you XIC) finally had some pity on us and decided to give us 5 days off… Therefore, I decided to finish my assignments and write… Not that I have any burning issue to talk about, but yes, my random thoughts floating here and there as always… So here goes…

I saw Kaminey today. Needless to say, as an after effect I’m still drooling over Shahid, yes the BOTH of them! ;) I liked the movie; it’s full on Dhannnn taaa nannnnnnnn!

Pardon me for coming back to the two words that have been all over the papers lately and of which you must be sick and tired of by now, Swine Flu. But its magnanimity has seriously left me dumb-founded, probably because it’s closely associated with one of my favorite cities, Pune. Travelling by the Mumbai local trains and walking on the streets, seeing everyone equipped with their masks, handkerchiefs, shawls, stoles or any piece of cloth for that matter and laden with an intense sense of fear which is very evident in their eyes. It scares me.

I miss Manipal. I really do.

Nose rings. Wear it ONLY if it suits you dahlings’! Now, now, you don’t want to look like a walking-talking fashion disaster, do you? :P

Public Relations & Corporate Communication. Phew!

I want to be dedicated to dedication, sincere to sincerity and committed to commitment.

The ways of Mother Nature are simply beautiful. Subtle and strong, all at the same time. There are some forces in life you don’t dare to mess with.

I’ve always wondered why the city of Mumbai is what it is. And you know what, each passing day in this place makes me marvel at this thought even more…

I thank all my class/batch mates throughout school, junior college, graduation and post-graduation. You have acted as a catalyst in making me work harder, think smarter and try to give everything I do nothing less than a 100%.

I will lose weight and I will get fitter. Don’t ask me when. I WILL.

A long-distance relationship is not that bad a concept after all. :) It’s like that approach-avoidance conflict we learnt in our Psychology lectures. Where the same thing, comes with its positives and negatives both.

Xavier Institute of Communications, Mumbai is taking me closer to realizing my dreams. From MIC to XIC, after being ‘inspired by life’, I am finally in a place ‘where potential becomes achievement’! ;)

Till next time, lots of love xoxo