Hmmm...

There... After all the procrastination... I'm finally a victim of 'blogomania'! A new pass time, a new addiction, a new means to vent my anger, a new place for my emotional outbursts, a new way of looking at things, a new platform to voice my opinion or then, a completely new thought process.. I have no idea what this is going to be.. But whatever it is... It's still me.
It took me a lot, trust me, a lot, to get started. I mean I found the entire concept so vague. Why would I in my right senses want the whole world to know how I'm feeling right now or what I'm thinking of at this very moment. But then, why not? To start with, I'm not going to write about how I mended my broken heart or my opinion on the latest political development. I have nothing against either, but neither is my inspiration or motive to start blogging. As of now, I'm just torn between choices, make that priorities. What, when, why and how? If only I knew...
It's amazing how the people you think you can actually count on end up being the ones who let you down. No, don't worry, I'm not getting negative in here. On the contrary, I feel like laughing at myself. Call it wrong judgement, disguised influence or plain stupidity, I've kind of mastered the act of fooling myself into the 'right' kind of people for me. Has the definition of trust changed these days by any chance?
Another thing, now if you know how to do this, please please please do let me know ok. Live without expectation. Impossible right? I mean isn't it human tendency that when you give something, you expect something in return? But I just realised that if I can handle this herculean task, I can probably conquer the world! Maybe being a little selfish is the only solution.
Isn't it ironic that sometimes there's absolutely nothing to do and sometimes everything at once! Actually I'm currently stuck in quite a similar situation. A little too much work, headed in opposite directions, risking friendships and relationships, trying to keep prior commitments while discovering something new, perhaps making the mistake of mixing the the personal with the professional, and oh yes, how can I forget, 'trusting' and 'expecting' a little too much... More? Maybe later..